If you had told me I would change my perspective on huge ways this year I wouldn't have believed you. 2018, for me and many in the spiritual community I follow that tend to be at the forefront of trends, was a year of purging. That brought on a lot of change in and of itself but this year has been the settling in of those changes. I've spent more time in silence. I'm maintaining only two adult relationships: my mother and my husband. In both cases I can't say that I'm close to either of them. I haven't been close to them for a long time. The Spiritual Path is a language and way of being that is unique. In a way it leads to a sort of isolation from the rest of the world because it's such a different perspective. Being An Empath Mommy Is Rough All of my time is spent taking care of my daughter. This year has been a major challenge. I've always preferred to be alone. I find being with people to be draining. I can intuitively sense other peoples needs, feelings and wants. I didn't imagine how drainig emotionally having a Little One would be emotionally. Not to mention that I was worried about her surviving that first year. The week in the N.I.C.U. scared the crap out of me. I check to make sure she's breathing well often at night even now. That's common I know. That fear has diminished greatly now that she's over 12 months and can walk. She is the most delightful, funny and stubborn baby! I had a dream before she was born that she was like the little triceratops character, Cera, from the Land Before Time. I hated that movie because it was so sad but that character is one of my favorites. I've been filled with awe and wonder. I've had days where I'm so worn out and overwhelmed that I cry silent tears just as I drift off to sleep like all first time mothers. Quitting Social Media This was the best decision I made. I feel it's similar to when I stopped watching the news. I spent far too much time worrying about the people on there. Suffering is a natural part of the human condition. I feel other peoples suffering so acutely that it's painful to witness. I may see the choices that would lead to some alleviation of suffering but I've learned to be very careful when giving advice...and it's rare I choose that route. I came to realize that social media was just bearing witness to other peoples suffering without having a means to help. Misery loves company. That's all I can think to say. I'm much happier without that experience. Relationships I now see my husband and my mother as the materialistic me-first people that they have always been. I've really had to accept that most people have a me-first attitude. That's just natural survival instinct. Most people remain in those bottom two rungs of Maslow's hierarchy. Each day is a struggle. My mother hasn't really been there for me because her health barely allows her to do the office work of her business. She provided for my Dad and brother so that is unlikely to change anytime soon. Even if I called her because I had a question about the baby she rarely had time to talk. She's changed a lot since the accident. My husband has had a hands off approach to our daughter. When he comes home he wants to be eat dinner and be left alone. If I asked him to hold her when he comes up he names every every reason not to...he has to wash his hands, he needs to use the restroom, and he needs to drink a glass of water. He doesn't spend more than exactly 15 minutes with her alone and he's extremly judgmental of how I should be parenting. He prefers to binge watch movies and television on his phone, clean his guns or play his music equipment. The stress of being the only income provider and the extra responsibility of being a manager at work is causing him to escape anyway he can. The happiest he's ever been, in his own words, was when he was going to college full time, worked two jobs and rode his bike everywhere. The vast majority of people are happiest during that time of little responsibility and sheer potential. That's how I realized that on a subconscious level having a wife and kids were just items on a list he wanted. He really wanted kids, it was a deal breaker for him in previous relationships when the other person didn't want kids. He's having a lot of trouble with handling the stress and responsibility of having dependents. So, he's escaping. We have a date once a month where my parents watch Michelle. Those have been some interesting and often awkward adventures. I can't say that they've been romantic or brought us closer together but we're trying. In the end all of this has been for the best. I've been pushed to apply what I've learned on the Path and really tested. I feel that I've passed that test by maintaining my center more often then not this year with no one to lean on and hardly any reassurance. I'm super grateful for my husband and mom. They've been tremendous catalysts for my slow-growth this year forcing me to become even more independent. The Big Changes The level of acceptance and understanding that I have are surprising to me. I've realized that the majority of things in life can't be changed. I can't change society. I can't reverse climate change. I can't change my husband. I can't contol wildfires or the weather, etc. Physical life is finite...it's disposable. Energy is naturally recycled so nothing truly disappears. The dinosaurs went extinct but they're still here aren't they? Though they died millions of years ago we know they existed. I think you get my point. What I can do is accept and trust. I can change my reaction to these events. Knowing that on the level of my essence I am an eternal soul that has and will always exist I know none of that really matters. Yes, the human species is destined to go extinct. At some point if the theory is correct our sun will grow to the point it will engulf the Earth and....well, that's real climate change! That's only frightening if you believe your just the physical body. For me, the need to grasp has dissolved. I like beautiful things but I don't really need them or want them. I'm starting to see them as more of a burden. I prefer to have experiences to stuff. There are a couple of experiences of owning things that I would like to have...but I no longer want to keep them forever as I was for most of my life. I'm burning the decorative candles I've hauled around for years. I've purged everything that I can imagine this year. That surprised me and I really feel good about it. I realized I can live a very happy life without a lot of stuff. Carrying around all of that physical stuff is a lot of work too. Not that I'm about to become super simplified or something but I'm not in a hurry to add anything to what I already have. Stop Running I realized that I no longer feel the need to 'go home.' Now, in a few dreams the idea that I need to stop running came up. In one case I was cornered and I was told I couldn't continue to run. I realized recently that I no longer feel the need to "go home." This is something that a lot of people feel. At the core of that, based on my experience and meditating on that theme, is feeling dissatisfied or not safe in a current situation. In other words it's escapisim. I'm happy to be here right now. I love the reality I've created. I'm living one of the most outrageous best case realities. Sure I could imagine it being slightly easier but...I don't think it would be as precious or satisfying without the struggle. I'm not concerned with the future and I've released the past. I focus on the now. My greatest desire, to be a mother, is here right now. These are the moments I worked so hard for and I'm going to be grateful for each one. I would be doing myself a greatest disservice if I didn't wallow and enjoy these precious moments to the utmost. Things come and go in physical reality. I intend to enjoy the moment and the experience of it..but let it go when that experience has fulfilled it's purpose and accept the next one. There is a lot of beauty in the temporary because it's more meaningful. Conclusion I will go through the year review in film after I see the final Star Wars movie. That is the final touch for this year of endings. At the end of the day this has been a magical year. I'm really grateful for the huge spiritual progress I've made. I'm at peace in my heart...I'm home at last. I'm really enjoying and grateful for this silent and peaceful state of mind. This point of view is so radically different by what is commonly known that I'm becoming used to it...but it is the same state I had when I was a child. The silent removed observer drinking it all in instead of the frantic reactive analyzer. I think my prayer going forward into this next year will be that everyone in the world will stop trying to escape from the present moment.
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There is a lot of hype about the astrology of 2020 and I'm excited about the new decade. I always love beginnings. Goodness know's I've experienced a lot of Endings recently.
The series of rare planet transits technically started this month (December 2019). On the 24th/25th is the first eclipse of this eclipse season. Now, there are a lot of videos on this event. I'll share some at the bottom of this post. Many astrologers have been looking forward to 2020 for years. I just happened to start studying astrology last year because of the 7 original wanderers (the origin of the word planets) and what they have to do with the 7 Code. I must congratulate the spiritual community that people aren't making this a 2012 like event. Very few people are freaking out. I think a lot of people in the spiritual community have matured spiritually. 2012 acted as a hook but it was just the start of the Awakening. What Is The Astrology Of 2020? I'm not an astrologist. I haven't studied or researched this topic. What I know has been conveyed by the astrologers that I follow. I'm new to all of this but I will convey what little I understand. The energy has started with the Full Moon in Gemini on the December 12th, at 12:12am! In other words 12/12 at 12:12am. That is a wow moment! The big thing is a Stellum, or grouping of planets in the Zodiac sign of Capricorn. Among this Stellum is Pluto and Saturn that will be in conjunction. The last conjunction was in 1982-1983. This is the first time humanity has consciously witnessed this conjunction in Capricorn because Pluto is a more recent discovery. Second we have a series of Eclipses- called an eclipse season- starting on December 25th (Christmas). These eclipses will go right through to December of 2020 when, I believe, the eclipse will be in Aquarius. We have the relatively rare conjunction of Pluto and Saturn. Along with the super rare Stellum in Capricorn (I believe people are saying the last time this happened was during the 1200's). The North Node is also in Capricorn. According to modern astrologers the North Node represents the goals of the soul or collective consciousness. Capricorn is associated with business, structures and limitations but also cosmic order. Meanwhile, the South Node is in Cancer...the sign of the ocean and of the Mother. One astrologer said that most people will be affected in January and February...and that will be it. Most astrologers believe the energy will continue through the year. You can see all those videos at the end of this post. Why It Is Personal To Me Now, it just so happens that many of these planets were also in a Stellum in Libra 1982-1983. I know this because I was born during a Blood Moon (Lunar Eclipse) with the Stellum in Libra during the Pluto/Saturn conjunction of that time. Capricorn is also my Ascendant (meaning it was on the horizon at the time of my birth) and my Moon sign. Cancer is my Sun sign (the type of astrology most people are familiar with- the one you read about in the newspaper). Realizing that I have more Earth in my birth chart and that it was Capricorn made so much sense to me. I've always had an understanding of business that is intuitive. For me personally, that means that the Pluto/Saturn conjunction in Capricorn is happening in my First House of Identity. This also means I may see some health issues. I know that I plan on having a high risk pregnancy during that period. So, my health will be a major focus of 2020. Adding a second child to the mix will undoubtedly change my identity. My first daughter who passed away in 2015 (a year mentioned a lot when people are talking about these astrological events) and last year when I had Michelle. So, the astrology seems spot on on in my case. I'm excited about these transits because I feel I'll learn more about myself. Splitting Of The Timelines Bashar is calling 2020 "The Eye Of The Storm." Most other sources about timelines that I pay attention to are saying that the split is happening in 2020. This is where we will see big things starting to happen thanks to so many Awakening. There will be some people that are not ready for "5D" or what the Hopi call the Age of the Human. They are still stuck in experiencing the lessons from living life as an Animal. I've had a lot of dreams confirming the split. I've seen other timelines. In the I'll fated time line I had two daughters (Lilith Ann was still alive so it was her and Michelle), I was still working my corporate job and no one cared about who the president was...it was, for all intents and purposes, business as usual. In another dream I was tutoring students in different classes. I was giving the answers of a test to one of the girls in a class. One of the other students failed the test, which meant they were failing the class, and they were kicked out of the school completely. When I dream about schools I know that's one of mys symbols for Earth. The different classes were soul groups. This dream meant that one pod within a soul group will be leaving this collective consciousness experience. The transition may be swift or they just may simply seem to move away or leave our lives in some way. I'm not sure but that's the first time I've had that experience. Finally, there was a dream where I was on a ride. The ride was going up an incline. The incline was smooth but people were pretending it was bumpy because they were excited. I knew from there on it would be a gradual but really swift descent. So, don't expect a ton of drama next year. If something really dramatic is going to happen it will probably happen in January/February. Yet, next year the Splitting of the Timelines...where the two paradigms of duality and Unity/Christ consciousness (those who have Awakened to their true Divine Nature) will be apparent. Those ready for Unity Consciousness (5D) will thrive in the new energy while those who people are not done with exploring the animal level of our soul evolution will feel like they are walking up hill in four feet of snow wearing sandals, shorts and a tank top...they will fill out of place as reality starts to adjust to the large amount of the Awakened who may not be the majority but because they are working with Unity Consciousness in partnership with the Creator (instead of opposed to the natural order as humanity has for centuries) will naturally have more support and success. Also, finally on 12/12, I had a dream I saw an Orca. Then I was swimming among a pod of Orcas (which was alarming since I know they can eat Seals that are my size). Then I was asked by a male voice, "Do you want to help me redecorate March 3 2033?" That would be 3/3/33! Some are saying the energy that starts in 2020 will carry through to 2034. I want to remind everyone that the Great Pyramid Timeline ends in 2038 so that matches up perfectly. I haven't watched videos talking about that particular perspective on the phenomenon but I have had heard non-astrologists mention it. Also, the Maya feel 2012 was the start of a time period that would end in 2038 as well. The Mayan elders were actually puzzled by the Doomsday 2012 idea. For me 2012 was one of the best years of my life as I experienced more financial success than ever before as I graduated from college with my MBA and I had a lot of wonderful friends supporting me.
What Are The Wanderers?
Classically, there were only seven planets (Sun, Moon, Venus, Mercury, Mars, Jupiter and Saturn). These stars appeared to wander or travel through the sky as the rest of the stars were fixed. Sirius, the North Star, for example, doesn't appear to move. I wanted to share this excerpt from The Seven Gates Of Righteous Knowledge by Rabbi Moshe Weiner and Dr. Michael Schulman because it states what I have intuitively known for a long time. I think it's amazing that in the oral teachings of Judaisim that Christianity did not inherit hold so much knowledge that I knew intuitively to be true : "What was the original error of Enosh (Enoch) and his generation? In his days, mankind made a great mistake, and the wise men of that generation gave thoughtless and spiritually erroneous advice. They said God created the stars and the planets as his means to control the world, and He put them in the expanse of the universe, magnified their greatness, and treated them with honor, making them His servants who minister before him and administer the world. They reasoned that it is therefore logically proper for people to praise the celestial bodies, glorify them and treat them with honor. These people also erroneously decided that it is the will of God that mankind should do this, just as a human king desires that the servants who stand before him should be honored by the common people, for doing so is an expression of honor to the king. Once this mistaken understanding took root in their hearts, they began to build places to worship the stars and planets, and to offer sacrifices to them. They would praise and glorify them with words and prostrate themselves before them, because by doing so, they would -according to their false conception- be fulfilling the will of God." As you can see, there is the belief in Jewish tradition that the planets are aspects, kind of like thoughts or attributes of Gods personality, that we can witness. They are called the original Emanations of the Cosmic Mind in some teachings. They are not 'Gods' in their own right but they have been personified by people. Cultures the world over have carefully tracked these Wanderers believing that they indicated the energy of the times. In Christianity the wanderers were changed from Gods to the choirs of Angel's. So when people say they are working with angels... they are working with these same forces. Each planet is simply switched to a choir of Angel's with different archangels in charge but they represent the same cosmic forces. The esoteric Ray's are also an interpretation of these seven wandering planets. Each of us belong to those Rays...so their movements also suggests whats going on with those Soul Groups. Now, there are some videos I want to embed and discuss my point of view on them.
Ceres Among The Stellum
Ceres is the Goddess of the Harvest. She is also the mother of Persephone who was tricked into the Underworld by Pluto/Hades. I view Persephone as a symbol for mankind. Just as her time was split between Earth and Spirit so too are we...we spend time on Earth In Avatars and time in Heaven as pure spirit. The Harvest, if course, is an important concept in Christianity. People were supposed to cultivate the spark of the Divine the size of a Mustard Seed and spiritually grow the seed of life into the Tree of Life, the image of the Divine, within them. If you take the symbol of each planet in this conjunction/stellum it would be...Time (Saturn), Pluto (Reaper), Great/Large (Jupiter) and Ceres (Harvest). Time of the Reaper to gather the Large Harvest. I may revisit the idea of the harvest and how it ties in with many Creation Stories (not just Christianity) in another blog. I think I've talked about it elsewhere but I've really meditated on that and had other epiphanies.
Eris - The Uninvited Feminine
Here is another part of the story. I plan to go down the rabbit hole by looking into the story of this planet and how it aligns with the Maleficent movies in next weeks blog. I don't really like doing that because it can become so convoluted (when studying spirituality it really comes down to the KISS principal- Keep It Simple Stupid- because as the game of telephone happened so many details were added the truth became bogged down in a swamp). Yet, I think it's import and and it's a bit personal for me (which I admit may make my perception warped) so I'll explain that in the next blog. The Dwarf Planet Eris. Now in the Dogon Creation story there were Eight Ancestors. The first six ancestors appeared and did their work without issue. The Eighth ancestor (light), however, descended out of order. The Seventh Ancestor was so angry that it killed the Eighth Ancestor. Therefore, the seventh ancestor that was supposed to descend, never did. Only Seven, with the final being light, descended. That's why our world is becoming...not finished. Creation is not complete. The Creator, in the story of Genesis, is just taking a rest. That doesn't mean he's finished. This means that only Seven Ancestors (Seven days of creation) occurred with an Eight Ancestor or step in Creation yet to emerge. The corroboration to this story is in the Kabbalah. Here the cosmic being Adam Ha Rishon gives the light to Malkuth too early causing Malkuth to break and reject the light. This created the Shadow Klipoth- the negative version of the Sephiroth...which created duality and is the reason why humans have such a long path. Edgar Cacye describes it as a Soul Group descending into the Earth and pushing into Matter inspiring evolution as they experimented (I always look at T-Rex and think the souls who created that experiment were funny). This explains the very disjointed evolution of life on Earth- once algae was created everyone wanted the experience so algae took over the Earth and created a massive amount of oxygen- and if you look at Earths History it makes total sense. Anyhow, there was an intervention to create a better vessel for these distracted lost souls (the human body) but it went wrong...but I'll get into that in a blog. Again, the vessel was defiled and the level of consciousness/vibration son Earth dropped. We see the same story in the classic story of Sleeping Beauty. The Eighth Fairy was uninvited...so she cursed Sleeping beauty but the Seventh Fairy changes the curse so that when Aurora pricks her finger she falls asleep instead of dying. Hence this is why we are collectively, "Waking up!" our vessels are finally capable through much work over multiple lifetimes to hold the light. This Dwarf Planet, that is going to square Saturn has a deeper meaning then what Molly is picking up. If we boil down the symbol it means, "Time For "" (the Eighth ancestor!). On a side note, the story of the Collective changed regarding this 8th ancestor. The movie Maleficent marked the change. Maleficent, not the prince, saves Sleeping Beauty in the story. In Maleficent 2: The Mistress of Evil she turns into the Phoenix. Also, this is our Ninth Planet. She is a dwarf planet that exists beyond Pluto. No doubt it was because this planet was found that caused Pluto to be downgraded to a dwarf planet. They probably debated including Eris as a planet and voted against it. This is, for all intents and purposes, Nibiru in the Sumerian system by the way. The story of Nibiru, which caused chaos in our galaxy, matches perfectly with the story of Eris. I will go into so much more in next weeks blog. At 25:31 and 26:52 minutes Acuyta-Bhava Das brings up two ancient texts that say if all the planets are aligned in Capricorn that it means that there will be a great flood. Now, in my opinion this flood is not physical like the tale of Noah. The meaning and nature of this flood is explained when we understand the nature of Aquarius (the final eclipse next year will be in Aquarius). Aquarius is an Air sign...his jug of water is not filled with water...but Light. Our planet is being flooded with Light! Now, remember that Malkuth, when the light came out of order, caused destruction and the Vessels broke. Not only did Malkuth (our level of creation) fail to hold the Light but she rejected it. Some would say "she" became evil. Yet, again, I don't think we look at our part of Creation which includes all Material Reality as a being...let alone a personified female being. Now, we are being inundated with the light again. Those who have diligently worked to grow that spark of the Divine that is their original unique emanation from Source/God will be able to hold the light. Those who have not done the work over multiple lifetimes will not be able to hold the light and will sink down further energetically. Again, this indicates the splitting of Timelines or what, I believe, Bashar calls the Shattering of the Prism. The Prisim is perfect because, again, we see humanity depicted as the Cosmic Rays associated with the colors of the Prisim. The story of the fish of course is reminiscent of Yeshua when he was speaking from that place of Unity Consciousness and of the Age of Pisces. He would be the physical fulfillment of that story. The Inclusive Unity Consciousness (Christ Consciousness) is what people will have to attach themselves to in order to ride out the tides of this flood of light. I recommend that you check out the rest of the videos in this Saturn and Pluto Conjunction series. I love Acuyta-bhava's content. The Sea Goat Turning Into The Unicorn As Acuyta-Bhava Das points out the Capricorn is depicted as a Goat, a completely land based animal,but it's really a Sea-Goat. The symbol of Capricorn is a Goat with a Mermaids tale showing it has an equal balance of Earth and Water. The two horns on the goat represents duality. The Mermaid, of course, is a mystical symbol a lot of people connect to...and it represents humanity lost in the Ocean of the Subconscious. That is a fit symbol for how humanity has operated up until now. Yet, the evolved symbol for Capricorn as Anastasia the Astrologer pointed out when discussing this transit- is the Unicorn. Anastasia also touched upon the fact, in one of her videos, that Capricorn's evolved symbol is the Unicorn. The Unicorn has...of course one horn....the symbol of unity. There is proof that Goat's were the source of this myth because there are Goats that are born with a single horn. So, how perfect is this symbol...and how it exists in nature? Conclusion My apologies that this was so deep and long. I just felt I needed to get all of this information out there. I haven'y had the opportunity or the push from Spirit to write recently. I couldn't sleep for a few nights when I didn't write this because the inspiration and perception of what the 2020 energy became really clear. I guess you could say I had a series of what is popularly called "downloads" among the spiritual community. My guess is that most people won't notice the transition of 2020. While a lot of people have awakened it's not the majority. A lot more people have had the same realizations I have and awakened to Unity Consciousness then I ever imagined in 2007. If you're one of the incredibly sensitive people like me then you'll know. Most likely if you're reading this blog you are but take this as you will. Use your discernment when researching this topic. Don't take my word for things. A lot of people are marketing it pay-per-view videos so know it's being marketed and mined for all of it's worth because there is so much interest. Again, if someone's offering on this topic feels you with fear...they are not authentic. If they tell you that you have to spend money to ascend they are probably frauds. If you have the money and you have anxiety about whats coming up...and you want to spend it on this go for it. I have a lot of exciting posts coming up. The videos that follow are some of those I think are relevant for the 2020 events. Not all of these are 2020 videos but you can get an idea of the energy that's building. Keep in tune for next weeks post and remember I love you! Also, I have written the recap of the movies and the themes that came up in the Collective Energy of last year. I was really surprised. The only reason I'm waiting to post those is to see Frozen II and Star Wars The Rise of Skywalker so those will be out in January.
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This year I meant to continue the YouTube channel and to publish the book- The 7 Code- that I wrote. Yet, I met such resistance in myself and in my day to day life that I have had to let go of both projects.
When it comes to the book the program that I was using to write the book decided to barf and I lost the file. I had been having a real challenge editing the book. Finding time to write these blogs are a challenge. So, it was taking me a lot longer to write those then I wanted. Yet, what I found is that my feeling towards both of these projects change. As my identity changes yet again in my life (my ascending sign is Capricorn so all of the crazy astrology of 2020 is happening in my house of self-identity) these were the final blocks of that old 'tower' that I had built in my life. This goes back to what we explored about the Tower Card. Part of the Path of the Seeker is taking down that Tower intentionally. Just as a toddler will knock down a tower of blocks...when we build up a complex life the tower will eventually fall. That's what I have witnessed be dismantled in my life since 2018 which was probably the most intense. That tower is heavy in nature. Carrying around all of that can be a burden. I fill fulfilled in the last chapter in my life. This blog was wildly successful for a long time. Far more people watched my YouTube channel then I ever imagined. I'm already a published author...and it was back when it was a lot harder than now. The Book For the book, I realized that what I was writing was not right. What I will be writing is the 7 Universal Steps To Wholeness. That will be more of a self-help book for people who's lives have fallen apart. That will be a little bit of a road map that will apply to everyone...instead of examine each system. I still want to publish the 7 code material but I think that will be after this other book. Yet, writing in general is on hold until five years or so in the future. I barely have time to write these blogs. YouTube I have no desire to work on the YouTube channel at this time. My husband, for one, has no interest in watching our daughter so I can work on the videos. He's so far behind on house projects that we need to get done to have both the rooms for our children ready (we will hopefully have the second in 2020). Those videos took hours of work and I just don't have the time when I'm watching my daughter. I'm very grateful that I had such a wildly successful YouTube channel. That thousands of people watched my videos are humbling. I am not someone who likes the spotlight and I don't think much about how much I have exposed myself by writing this blog or making those videos. For now, thought, YouTube is changing in undesirable ways. I'm hoping a new format comes along where average people can make and publish channels now that YouTube is under Google Censorship which has done so much on Facebook. Conclusion The final two blocks that I was holding onto in my tower are released. Next year is a blank slate except for a second child. The next five years of my life will be focused on my children instead of spiritual pursuits. I think the biggest changes have occurred and it's time to move on for a time. Creating the foundation for two very stable children is important and I've shared a vast amount of resources/information on this blog. This blog is all that really remains of that former life that was so focused on the spiritual. My practice had moved from the internet and research to application. I have my little altar that is really used just to create a sacred space where I can tune into the divine through prayer and meditation. Thank you all for taking this journey on the Spiritual Path with me! I've meditated on this a lot this year.
The simple answer is yes. Twin Flame And Soulmates In the spiritual community there is an over emphasis on finding a twin flame or soul mate. The idea, most believe, is that they will feel complete that way. Their soul mate will naturally understand them right? There 'other half' will have all the answers right? Often times the people seeking this don't even know or understand their own needs, desires and wants. Twin Flame and soul mate relationships are the hardest because there is so much karma baggage and you will discover all of your flaws. I've met several of my soul mates and it's rough. My two most important relationships are both soul mates and my mother is the one that I'm working through the most lessons with. Both are also materialists. From experience, because I was that way, people looking for twin flames and soulmates are really missing is the connection to the Divine. They think a soul mate will "fix" everything and make them whole but that desire will not be met even if they find their soul mates and unless they are willing to do inner work the relationship will leave them bitter and damaged. This may be a result of the story society has developed about relationships. The miserable hero of the story desires more and then along comes a relationship and they live happily ever after as a result. Isn't this most love stories and Disney movies? Not to mention the American dream. Get a job, get married, buy a house and have kids. That will make people happy won't it? No, it won't. A miserable person just becomes more miserable with the extra responsibility. There are people who never should live in a house because it takes upkeep. A lot of people just aren't up for a marriage or to take care of kids. Dependents are extra mouths to feed and more stress. Back when I married my husband the Great Awakening hadn't happened. Most people were still spiritually asleep and pursuing the formula of materialistic needs in attempt to be happy. I'm guilty of thinking that way at one point too. Yet, that's the major paradigm shift that's happening...that materiality- whether in another person, a group or label that we claim, or an item such as cars, etc. When most people fulfill that formula and they weren't happy they turn to psychiatry. That's why anxiety medicine addiction is an epidemic that no one is talking about. There are a lot of people out there that are miserable with what they were told would bring happiness and they think that something is wrong with them. The commercials, sitcoms and movies have sold them on this idea...but that deep level of unfulfillment is the most common part of the human experience. Edgar Cacye stated that we have hundreds of soul mates...they are just people that we incarnate with the most often. We attract the ones that are most like us and at different times we can encounter them depending on personal spiritual growth. The idea that God created two souls at the same time so they are exactly the same is nonsense as well. All of the esoteric material suggests that all souls start out exactly the same. The idea that there is a little factory churning out an infinite amount of souls on the spiritual level of experience is possible but it's a very limited Christian idea. This idea causes all kinds of strange stresses such as God created each of us for a specific purpose on Earth. When, our main purpose on Earth if you study all forms of spirituality, is experience which teaches and flavors our soul. Edgar Cacye says that were were all created at the same time before the Earth Experience. All of the esoteric material also agree that the ultimate reality is that we are all One on the level of Source. We existed as a part of Source from the start, then we have started working our way through physical material reality as part of that One Creator experience of knowing itself. Some of those sources are Edgar Cacye, Bashar, Paul Foster Case, and Thomas Campbell. My Experience I've had some interesting conversations with my husband this year. I knew when I met him that he was an atheist. Several conversations later and he's willing to admit that there is no physical proof that a God exists but there is no physical proof that proves that God doesn't exist. He now states the idea of God or an afterlife can't be determined in physical reality. Since he recognizes now that atheists are anti-God he no longer says he's an atheist. Further, he doesn't believe in anything that's not physical reality. Anything that exists solely as an idea is disregarded including theoretical science. So, in other words unless he can't detect something with his five sense it doesn't exist. He calls this being a realist. Having a conversation with him about anything even slightly abstract or about the nature of consciousness and myth is pointless. He merely quotes his college comparative religions teacher who converted him to atheism. As a result of this approach to life the only thing that really excites my husband are physical objects and actions. For example, he has a hundred ideas about what he would like to do...but it's just ideas he likes to take out like a shiny item to impress others but he never actually does. At one point he told me that if he could live forever and have endless money he would earn every degree available. I was shocked by the idea because it never occurred to me. I have always seen degrees as a means to an end (a better job) and nothing else. Yet, isn't that why most souls incarnate on Earth? To learn as much as possible in a short span of time? When he gets something and the newness wears off he wants something new. For example, getting a particular Harley was such a priority for him that we got it before a house or kids. He literally had a list of things we had to have before he'd consider having kids. I had no choice once I married him but to agree to this list of things and work on achieving them. The Hungry Ghost In the Buddhist community there is the idea of the Hungry Ghost. The Hungry Ghost can never find fulfillment. It just consumes, consumes and consumes. Yet, no matter what they consume they are never satisfied. Doesn't this capture the idea of a materialistic person? No matter how many houses, boats or items they collect or horde they are never satisfied. Instead with more stuff comes more responsibility and stress. In the end, they are miserable and dissatisfied. The stuff and money isn't what makes these people miserable. The reason Yeshua said that the rich people are not likely to enter the kingdom of heaven (a state of mind not a physical place) is because they are so distracted by getting more stuff and keeping the stuff they have it leaves little time for them to contemplate a Higher Power. Now, I confess I've gone on shopping sprees. I'm someone who loves decorating as a method of self-expression so I like stuff too. I used to be super attached and sentimental but that has dramatically changed in the last year. As I've stated over and over on this website, the hole addicts of all forms are trying to fill can only be filled through Divinity found by walking the Inner Path. That's why the twelve step program has the limited success that it does...because one of the steps is surrendering to that Higher Power. That's not entirely successful because it doesn't wake people up to their own Divinity within because it's a system created at a time of a lot of 'realists' that believed "God" exists outside of them as a force instead of realizing that they are a precious part of of that divinity. Even in death these hungry ghosts may hang around the Earth as ghosts unable to leave the objects of their desires or living vicariously by attaching to the living that are like them. They don't realize there is so much more than this physical reality. Materialist vs Narcissist A materialistic person is a narcissist. I think that's the default position of most people. I know it was for me and the hundreds of people I know. The normal path people tread is the, "What's in it for me?" If they don't get what they desire that changes to the resentful state of believing they are, "Being held down by the 'system' or 'man'." Then they strike out at other people and because they don't get the concept of spiritual Oneness wonder why a few years later they suffer greatly. Every energy that we direct and send out to others comes back to us...and striking out at others that we think are 'wrong' never brings long lasting happiness. We shouldn't judge people who are narcissists. As I said, all of us start off as narcissists. Some people who think they are Empath's because they are sensitive but they are narcissist. Just having psychic abilities and naturally tuned into the Collective Conscious doesn't mean that someone is 'good' and people who take advantage of that are 'evil.' As long as your trying to force outer reality to cater to your needs....your a materialist and a narcissist....the only difference is if you have a savior or superiority complex because of your gift. That's like saying that I'm good because I'm at Reading so I'm a good person and all the people who are good at Math are evil. I just wanted to touch upon that idea because it's just as poisonous as the soul mate one. The Effects Let's start off with the benefits I've experienced. The biggest benefit is that being married to a materialistic person is a comfortable lifestyle. They want to live comfortably so a nice house, vehicles and food on the table is natural. He handles all the details because he worries and cares about them the most. That way I don't have to be distracted by the day to day worries. Second, your more likely to have kids. Back when I started on the spiritual path there weren't many interested in The Path as there are now. The people that were traditionally known to be spiritual were those who swore off having a family- monks, nuns and priests. This may change with the Great Awakening...instead of the extremes and a small class of isolated people pursuing the inner life it may be common for everyone. Third, he keeps me grounded which is what I needed most. I was so off balance (and so is he but it's not as extreme when focused on materialism) that being around another person experiencing the highs and lows would have made it more acute and painful. Fourth, he can meet his own needs because he's independent. I don't need to do anything for him. He's perfectly capable of taking care of himself and doesn't need me for anything. That means I really don't have to worry about him. We can just coexist without drama. Now let's look at the negatives I've experienced. Since he required physical items before kids (my main goal) I became focused on making money. I've never had issues with prosperity, as he has, but it is far too easy and encouraged by our society to become sucked into the rat race. Maintaining a spiritual practice with a non-spiritual person is also very hard. I've learned that the hard way. I completely lost track of the Path as I pursued the material goals. While I was excited about 2012 in 2007 I totally didn't pay attention that date when I was focused on reaching materialistic goals. There has to be firm set boundaries and a level of relentless dedication to maintain a spiritual practice in a non-spiritual relationship. Chasing a bigger house in a nicer area and more stuff can consume an entire lifetime very easily leaving no time for your practice as you fly from one even to the next. I totally understand why the majority of people spend the first half of their life focused on material pursuits. Another negative is that a wife and kids are just items on the list of the materialistic person. Yup, I've become aware that I'm more of a possession to him then a relationship. He's happy I'm here but he prefers that I stay in the background. He will go out of his way for the friendships that he is pursuing in the outer world, Not only does he see my needs, desires and wants as a burden but he doesn't even want to know what they are...and unless they are also something he wants he will undermine them if it will impact obtaining his next desire. Finally, their consciousness is like the very tippy top of an iceberg. Know that what they say and how they act will not be the same. Their subconscious shadow that is under the surface of their awareness is huge. I've discovered that they often have no idea what their motivations are or what their truth is because they are so other and outer oriented that they are in denial. My husband insists he likes roller coasters, but after a decade of going to themeparks with him I can say 100% sure he doesn't because they make him motion sick. Yet, because he was trying to build a closer relationship with a friend he bought tickets to the most extreme Theme Park in California- Six Flags Magic Mountain. Even to this day he would insist he likes roller coasters but his actions- the result of his subconscious- clearly demonstrates he doesn't. Another example is my mom who believes that she's a very spiritual person but has never done the inner work. She has as all the trappings- the smudge and some crystals- but she has no idea what the phrase 'Inner Path' means. Now, it's fine that people don't walk the Path, I want to emphasize that A Good Study Once I detached from the emotional sting of taking off the rose colored glasses when contemplating my husband and mother I had a dilemma. That dilemma is best summed up by the title of this blog...can a Spirtual and Non-Spiritial person be in a relationship? I don't know many people who are as deeply spiritual as me. I have met one or two. I know a lot of posers and some of those do tarot readings for a living! In the end I realized two things. First, is the wisdom of the relationship with the Divine taking precedence before any relationship. My spiritual practice is the most fulfilling part of my life. That's brought the fullness and peace that allows me to be more present in my marriage and as a parent. The second is that in my personal case I prefer to be alone to contemplate things and make decisions slowly and plan things out. I'm not someone who really enjoys being in the company of others or random surprises. I feel drained after spending a lot of time with people (especially big groups). Third, these relationships are an opportunity to study and understand someone with a radically different approach to life. Instead of resisting the contrasts I've embraced them. I choose to study the situation. Both approaches to life work. There are some parts that are better then others on both paths. Who knows but the individual soul what experiences and lessons the soul intends to learn in the other persons lifetime? You can trust even if the person is a Sleeper their soul is accomplishing some sort of goal. Otherwise they wouldn't be in a physical body. As soo as a soul decides there is nothing to learn in a physical body the body dies. I listen a lot more. I will get into how I've learned to behave in another blog. I don't say much because there is no need. I know that much of that much of what my mom and my husband say is just conversation. Plus, nothing I will say will prompt them to do inner work...there has to be a desire on the soul level for that to happen. That's very rare so I don't expect anyone to develop that desire. Conclusion If I was focused solely on spirituality I'd probably have remained single. Yet, from the time I was little I wanted kids. With so few options available it was natural to end up with a material person. What I've learned is that relationships are not a place where you find completion or answers. Relationships are really a challenging place of learning. I am really starting to appreciate the contrast. I can see how the spiritual path has led to a deep unshakeable faith within me and less suffering. My understanding, love and compassion for others has multiplied. Further, my spiritual practice has led me to be more present so that I can see things as how they really are and not how I wish. I no longer project or resist the reality. I am also more present as a parent. There is less projection. I see my daughter as she really is and not what I want to see to make myself feel better. So, yes in my situation it is preferable to be in a relationship with a materialistic person.
This movie took me by surprise.
This is my current favorite movie of all time. Although fantasy I feel that it really caught the experience of having psychic gifts. The sense of fear and isolation that the main character, Dan, experiences are right on. Obviously, the depiction of those abilities are more dramatic then anything I've experienced (not saying someone might have those abilities) but there is so much. I've always loved the concept of the 'shine' in King's books. Because that's a good way to describe people who are connected to the Collective Conscious/Source. I was on the edge of my sit for much of this movie. I was actually sad that it ended. I love the character Abra and little indications of why she has the ability to bravely wield her ability. There is the image of a super hero on her bed stand and she takes on appearance of that super hero when facing the villains. Now Rose The Hat and company (the villains) are superb. They are the best depiction of psychic vampires I've ever seen. They are dramatic over stylized versions of that concept but really demonstrate the idea. There are nods to "The Shining" which it's technically a sequel. The directing andacting are top notch. This, for me, is the movie of the year! Go see it! |
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Brave Soul! May Your Journey On The Path Of The Seeker Bring You Joy and Peace! I'm currently posting every Saturday. With a new addition the family I have pre-scheduled most posts through December 2022. Full Moon Posts will contain up-to-date content when I can get to them. Thank you so much for your support and understanding! This is a place where you can encounter new spiritual ideas that have helped me develop as an Individual On The Path of the Seeker. Take or Leave this information as you see fit. Archives
April 2024
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